It’s worth a nickel

Today I got a letter from the Census Bureau. It’s really important… the envelope had messages about “official business,” and “penalties” for improper use.

It told me that I’d be getting my census form next week, and asked me to please fill it out and send it back.

Seriously? Why not just send me the form and ask me to fill it out? Why double your printing and mailing costs by reminding me to fill something out that I haven’t even received?

(Click the picture to read the whole mess of crazy, if you’re so inclined.)

I really do feel like the holidays snuck up on me this year. Before I knew it, it was Thanksgiving… yay!

And then the next day, as I was making turkey soup, I realized I hadn’t even thought about Christmas cards yet, and I broke into a cold sweat. Normally, I’m the kind of guy who has them written out, addressed, stamped, and sitting in a box on my desk while I enjoy Thanksgiving dinner. The formality of waiting until December 1st to mail them is just so that people don’t make fun of me for the November postmark, you know?

Well, fast forward to my Christmas gift shopping. In the interests of full disclosure, I think gift shopping is a real pain in the you-know-where. My list is mercifully short, so I really can’t complain too much, and I do as much as humanly possible online (thank you, Amazon).

There are certain things, though (clothing, for example), that I really prefer to buy in the stores. I want to feel the fabrics, look at the sizes, and generally experience them before I plunk down my hard earned cash for them. And, since I had a lot of vacation time left this December, I’ve managed to do that in-person shopping without going nuts. (2 PM on Mondays is a great time to be at the mall if you don’t like crowds.)

It should have been so easy. I went into Baby Gap (hey, I’m a new uncle). I found what I wanted. I went up to the register.

And they had no boxes.

Great, so the Gap is cheaping out this Christmas. They “ran out” of boxes, which really means they’re cutting costs, and you can just run down to Target and buy your own. I mean, I did that, because I really liked the things I bought… but I am disappointed in the lack of holiday spirit.

Hey Gap: you owe me $6.88 for the boxes and tissue paper you should have given me for free.

A few months ago, I wrote about some trouble I had at the Holiday Inn Newark International Airport.

After writing, I learned that—adding insult to injury—the hotel had even charged us for extra parking (three cars instead of two).

On July 1st, about a month after sending my letter, I got a call from Jason Lee, who works in the executive customer support area for Intercontinental Hotel Group. I can’t overstate how pleased I was with IHG’s reaction to the whole thing.

Jason never made any excuses about what happened. He simply apologized, said the hotel manager could have made things right himself, and offered to reimburse me for 100% of my costs.

About a week later, I had a check for $185.01.

In less flattering news, my cousin is now calling me CAM. That’s Consumer Advocacy Man, for those of you not in-the-know.

Mr. Andrew Coslett
Chief Executive Officer
InterContinental Hotels Group PLC
Broadwater Park
Denham
Buckinghamshire UB9 5HR
United Kingdom

Dear Mr. Coslett:

On Friday, 22 May 2009, my uncle passed away unexpectedly. As you might expect, many of my family members traveled to his funeral, in Newark, NJ.

My cousin and I both decided to stay overnight nearby, since we would have to drive in excess of an hour to go home between the wake and the funeral. We selected the Holiday Inn Newark International Airport, a mere 1.4 miles from my aunt’s home, since my cousin and his wife had stayed there previously.

I booked two rooms, described online and in the email confirmation (copy enclosed) as “1 KING BED W SOFABED NONSMOKING,” at a rate of $59 plus tax each, for the night of 26 May 2009.

On 26 May 2009, my cousin called and spoke with the front desk staff to confirm our rooms, since we knew we would be checking in rather late. In fact, we ended up checking in after 11 PM, and that’s when the problems began.

We were given adjoining rooms, which was wonderful! Unfortunately, they were both configured with two double beds, which don’t accommodate my cousin and his wife well, since they are both quite tall. Additionally, they are not what I reserved, and not what Holiday Inn confirmed.

I spoke with Freddie at the front desk, who told me there was nothing he could or would do. I asked to speak with the manager, and he told me he wasn’t available but that he would have him call me when he came back. When I pressed the issue, he told me if I had a problem, I should just deal with Holiday Inn’s corporate offices.

On my way back to my room, I encountered another hotel employee. I asked him if he was the manager, and he told me he was not, but offered to call him for me. He immediately called him on his mobile phone, and asked me to wait at the front desk for him.

I waited about ten minutes for Shakespeare, the manager on duty. (He later shared that he’d been in the bathroom, which was really more information than I needed. But I digress.) He told me that there were no king bed rooms available because of the holiday weekend, despite the fact that I had reserved and confirmed two of them. He finally offered to discount the rate by $5 per room, or to move me to the Crowne Plaza Hotel for the same rate. Due to the late hour (it was nearly midnight by this time), I declined to move at that time, since we needed to check out by 7:30 AM in order to arrive on time for the funeral. Shakespeare did not discount the room rate or make any further accommodation for my inconvenience.

Moreover, upon checking out, we discovered that we had been charged an additional $30 plus tax for overnight parking; this fee was not disclosed at any time during the reservation or check-in processes. The front desk “validated” the parking tickets, which would lead me to believe that the parking would be free or at least reduced in cost.

I feel that InterContinental Hotels Group and Holiday Inn have failed to meet two of their own “promises” and guarantees. Specifically:

Holiday Inn Hospitality Promise
Making your stay a complete success is our goal. Just let our Manager on Duty or front desk staff know if any part of your stay isn’t satisfactory. We promise to make it right or you won’t pay for that part of your stay.

Based on your Hospitality Promise, because I wasn’t satisfied with the room I was given, I should not have had to pay for it.

Online Reservation Guarantee
By securing your online reservation with a credit card, you are eligible for our Reservations Guarantee. If your reservation cannot be honored, the host hotel will provide a room at, and transportation to, another convenient and comparable hotel, and pay for telephone calls to notify family of the lodging change. The host hotel will also pay the full cost of the first night’s lodging rate, plus tax. Any advance deposit will be refunded.

Moreover, because I booked my reservation online and secured it with a credit card, I believe I am eligible for the provisions of the Online Reservation Guarantee. Shakespeare did not offer to transport me and my family at no cost, and did not offer to pay the full cost of the lodging at the Crowne Plaza. He should have done that, and his failure to do so must be remedied by InterContinental Hotels Group PLC.

My cousin paid the final bill with his credit card. Please contact me at your earliest convenience to arrange for the full reimbursement of our bill, or we will pursue a chargeback and file complaints with the appropriate government agencies.

In case you didn’t realize, I have an opinion on just about everything. And I’m very rarely shy about sharing it.

This isn’t a new thing.

From the Morris County Daily Record, Friday, February 17, 1995:

Wharton is lax about snow-shoveling code

To the Editor:

As a student at Morris Hills Regional High School in Rockaway and a resident of Wharton, I must take the bus to school each day. This, obviously, dictates that I walk from my house to my bust stop each morning and return home from my bus stop to my house each afternoon.

While this usually is not a problem, recently was an exception. On Feb. 6, there was a great deal of snow on the ground … and on the sidewalks.

Perhaps many readers are unaware that in Wharton there is a borough ordinance that requires snow be removed within 24 hours after it has stopped falling.

For those of us who do know this law exists, we certainly know the Wharton Police Department is very lax in enforcing this ordinance.

I have written to the police department in the past about this problem, and I received neither an answer nor action.

Through their negligence, the police clearly express their lack of concern for both the high school students who travel to their bus stops each day and the younger students, many of whom walk from home to the borough’s public schools.

I suggest anyone concerned by this delinquency on the part of our borough’s police department call the police station and request this ordinance be enforced. It is crucial to provide safety not only for an entire walking community of students but for the rest of the population as well.

CHRIS WYBLE, Wharton

In case you’re wondering, I never got any response from anyone on it.

You win some, you lose some.