when it’s time to change

i’ve been giving a lot of thought to my career lately. anybody who ever reads my crazy blog entries knows that i’m more likely to write about what’s going on at work than about any other thing, really.

i’m in a holding pattern. i want out of my current job, but my management has declared me a “critical resource.” that basically allows them to keep me in my job longer than they would be able to do otherwise. my current availability date (the date my management has agreed they will let me go to a new job) is 15th june … not so far away, really. (103 days, but who’s counting?)

and i’m interviewing, of course. i haven’t decided it’s time to leave the company just yet, although i don’t fault those who’ve decided it’s the best course of action. over the past nine months i’ve had close to a dozen interviews, and i’m still waiting for something to materialize.

in the meantime, how the #$&* am i supposed to stay motivated?

i’m rekindling an old dream. for years, i’ve been saying i want to go to law school before i die … and now i’m taking the steps to ready me to do it. i’ve read and downloaded a lot of material on going to law school, and i’m starting to prepare to sit for the lsat (law school admissions test) this fall. so far i’m doing well on the practice questions, though i haven’t managed to do an entire practice exam, timed, yet.

i’ve always said “it’s not worth it” or made some other lame excuse. suddenly, a daily train ride to and from manhattan doesn’t sound so bad, if it means i’m actually going to be doing something that is meaningful. yeah, i’m still anxious about the prospect of quitting my job to do it. i’m nervous about what it means for paul and me, and how our lifestyle may have to change from the comfortable one we’ve established. but at the end of the day, i think it might be the stimulus i need to make me a happier, more complete person.